Wednesday, December 3, 2008

#三個放不下#

自問真的是個蠢的可憐的笨蛋啊...
為甚麼要哭?為甚麼要把自己鎖在回憶里生活?
我也好想知道.........

很多事情, 越想忘記, 卻越會想起...真的很辛苦...
每每看到.碰到,聽到一些東西, 就會想起他與他...
回憶啊...你到底是要來幹嗎的呢???


我...被牽著了...被三個男的, 綁住了...

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

一個是活在天堂的他...
看著那照片, 那房間, 那電腦, 那書包, 那腳車...
聽著那些他聽過, 他會喜歡的歌...還有一首小時候一起笑過的歌...
我們曾經很靠近, 卻隨著年齡的成長而變得好遙遠...
這是甚麼呢??
為甚麼人總是失去了才發現擁有的美好???
***珍惜身邊的人***



另一個是很疼愛我的人...傷心欲絕的人...
看著他, 因失去他而傷心, 憔悴, 迷失...
他跟媽都很難過, 很讓人擔心...
不同的是, 媽媽比較堅強... (為甚麼我的性格不像她呢??)
我每次都有種放不下他的感覺...唉...
***感恩-父母恩***



最後...一個讓我很痛心, 失望的人...
我的喜怒哀樂, 除了爸媽, 他的影響是最大的...
把他看的那麼重, 他不會開心, 反而感到煩惱...
他說了很多不以為意的話傷了我, 卻不知道我要用多久的時間痊癒...
我總于明白, 為甚麼女生有時會做出很多無理取鬧的事情了...
我也總于變成那麼一個笨女人...真可笑...
我幾時才能擺脫那美好回憶的枷鎖呢???
***回憶的滋味***



是的...很多人安慰過我, 也勸過我...
學著放開, 放手, 面對...長痛不如短痛之類的...
哈...我也曾經勸過別人...
結果??? depends 吧...
我自問我是最沒用的人, 別人幫不到我, 我也幫不到我自己...
每次想到方法讓自己忘記, 讓自己看開, 到最後還不是淚留滿臉收場...
沒想過自己是這麼軟弱...恨死了...唉...



現在每次遇到甚麼事情, 都會想起以前所學過的名句精華...
原來...真的很有意思...


3 comments:

=) said...

if you dont mind i can giv you some opinion,perhaps these opinion are the same that you knew..

Did you ever asked urself who is the most important person in ur life?

If ur answer is urself,den ur problem is solve..

every single relationship is hard to find but when u hold it in ur hand make sure u could let go with dignity..since u got 3 man tat affected you..why dont u change urself or maybe ur life style..?

something tat u can see it could have a value,but u having 3 things that u could never value it.it is priceless..

the best part of life is not what you got.Is what you made for what you got..

being a weak emotion control person is not wrong so dont blame urself is just u are different from others ppl who take shorter time to recover..

every comment of mine, dont mean any offense

take care

~ # JaZzzMin3 # ~ said...

hey nenek!!
how come you are always so emo when you talk about love and relationship??? how are you and Shawn recently??
I hope you guys are doing great!
anyways, the past is the past. Let's keep them as old clothing and begin your 2009 like when you go shopping for new cloths.
Be Cheerful always!

Love ya! =)

Victoria Koh said...

I wish that year 2009 really wil be a good year for me.. a new turning point...
anyway, nenek, scar will alwaz there.. & it's still pain...
Thanks nenek..for still reading my blog~~~miss u so much~~~

Thanks for yo concern too Vin...