深思哲學 bla bla bla...

• 沒有一百分的另一半, 只有五十分的兩個人.

• 付出真心才會得到真心, 卻也可能傷得徹底; 保持距離就能保護自己, 卻也注定永遠寂寞.

• 通常願意留下來跟你爭吵的人, 才是真正愛你的人.

• 有時候不是對方不在乎你, 而是你把對方看的太重要. (或許吧)

• 冷漠有時候並不是無情, 只是一種避免被傷害的工具.

• 愛是: 如果我們之間有1000步的距離, 你只要跨出第一步, 我就會朝你的方向走其餘的999步.

• 為你難過而快樂的是敵人, 為你快樂而快樂的是朋友, 為你難過而難過的就是該放在心里的人.

• 就 算是believe中間也藏著一個 lie.

• 真正的好朋友並不是在一起就有聊不完的話題, 而是在一起就算不說話也不會感到尷尬.

• 朋友就是被你看透了還能喜歡你的人.

=If i were a boy=

If I were a boy
Even just for a day
I’d roll out of bed in the morning
And throw on what I wanted and go
Drink beer with the guys
And chase after girls
I’d kick it with who I wanted
And I’d never get confronted for it
Because they’d stick up for me

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he’s taken you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

If I were a boy
I would turn off my phone
Tell everyone its broken
So they think
that I was sleeping alone
I’d put myself first
And make the rules as I go
Cause I know that she’d be faithful
Waiting for me to come home (to come home)

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted (wanted)
Cause he’s taken you for granted (granted)
And everything you had got destroyed

It’s a little too late for you to come back
Say its just a mistake
Think I forgive you like that
If you thought I would wait for you
You thought wrong


But you're just a boy
You don’t understand (yea you don’t understand)
How it feels to love a girl
Someday you’ll wish you were a better man
You don’t listen to her
You don’t care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
Cause you've taken her for granted
And everything you had got destroyed
But you're just a boy…


RED : what a girl will do...
BLUE: what a guy usually do...

Why??? Stop comparing??!!!

2008...my last year for still being a teenager...
Coming new year...coming 20 years old...

Yeah...this is my last year... I am so sad when i realize my age sooner start with "2"...
I don have anything in this "last year" but only sadness & hurts...
Why???
Where is the life i enjoy so much before?
Before this, there is ntg special when we talked bout our childhood,
but now...I wonder how wonderful was it...compare to wat i've had now...
Simple chit-chat, simple laughter, simple life = happiness!!!

2008: Big twist in my life
Dreams may broke...the pastor said...& i understand...
But why? Why life is unfair??????

I know i love to cry...I know its annoying when a girl keep crying...
But...Its really hard to control...
At least i did so well in front my parents...
Isnt it should be like in a movie??
"Asking a girl to cry out when she felt sad rather than ask her stay quietly??"
I wish i can find someone to cry to...
But wat he did to me: he found my tears disturbing,bothering...
The one i wish he could comfort me, the one who could do this, doesnt care anymore...




Listening to the song
***If I Were A Boy***

What about yesterday....?

Finally finish my final...
& i know i did it badly....really bad....Erm...let me rate...

1) Accounting ----------> Worst
2) IFM ----------------> Bad
3) Marketing ----------> Moderate?
4) Business Law -------> Moderate?

Sigh...can i pass all that?? Probably not.... :(
Can i transfe/ exchange to Aus??? Poabbly not.... :(
Sob sob...... why like this..

.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.--.

8/11...yesterday.... my brother's birthday....
I wish him "Happy Birthday"....
In another world tat not belongs to us...
I knew my parents sure remember bout it....
17 years ago... he came to this world...
& 6 months ago... he left this world...
Mayb he will live happily ever after in his world now...
I wish he will..... No...For sure he will....


So....what's my birthday wish for next year??

Final Exam 28/10

Sigh...another final exam coming...
This final just recalled my memory about what had happen before last final exam...
Time passed rapidly...It had been about 4 & a half months ago...



Arhh....i don have mood to study at all...
Can't even remember what i've read an hour ago...
Anyone help me out please... teach me the way to concentrate on my studies....
Sobsob... I don wish to retake these subjects...
I don wish to waste my dad's money...

Monash...
Sunway...
"I hate u"...
Since i've been here, bad things keep happened...
I just hate to be here
***childish***

& i hate to walk along this corridor....
The long boring monash parking->cafeteria corridor...



How i wish i can transfer or exchange to Aussie campus...
Start new life there?? Is it possible??
Or it might be another nightmare for being so far away from my parents??
I don wan their worries...
I scared my dad lonely...
A lot of stuffs have to be consider...
Sigh....

the song - Bye Bye

.=_..**~Bye Bye~**.._=.

This is for my peoples who just lost somebody
Your best friend, your baby, your man, or your lady
Put your hand way up high We will never say bye (no, no, no)
Mamas, daddies, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins
This is for my peoples who lost their grandmothers
Lift your head to the sky 'cause we will never say bye

As a child there were them times
I didn't get it but you kept me in line
I didn't know why you didn't show up sometimes
It's something more than saying "I miss you"
But when we talked too
All them grown folk things
Separation brings
You never let me know it
You never let it show because
You loved me and obviously
There's so much more left to say
If you were with me today face to face


[Chorus:]
I never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on like
"I wish I could talk to you for awhile"
"I wish I could find a way try not to cry"
As time goes by And soon as you reach a better place
Still I'll give the whole world to see your face
And I'm right here next to you
It feels like you gone too soon
The hardest thing to do is say bye bye
Bye bye.......


And you never got the chance to see how good I've done
And you never got to see me back at number one
I wish that you were here to celebrate together
I wish that we could spend the holidays together
I remember when you used to tuck me in at night
With the Teddy Bear you gave to me that I held so tight
I thought you were so strong
That you can make it through whatever
It's so hard to accept the fact you're gone forever
...................................

< Keep changing>

"Do u know what's the most important thing to u??? Do u know how depress was it when the "most important thing" keep changing?? Become worst & worst........"








I found nobody really closed to me, really understand me anymore....family, friends, boyfriend....who else???
Even the person who sleep beside me, even we grew up together, as in now, we already don't understand each other....

These few days i stay at home...She kept hang out wif her friends...
We have had 3 times dinner in 7 days...Never sit together in the living room...
I knew there are many dissatisfactions and arguments between us...
What she did jus over my "acception" & so does her...
She angry on what i say & im angry on wat she did...& here's come the cold atmosphere between us...

I hope she'll know that everything changed...since the day he's gone...
She can still has her own freedom of cos, but not every day & night, somemore until late at night...Someone worried bout her, she just replied wif an annoying face...This disappointed him...vv much...do you understand?!!!!!

He cried many times...
Last time i wonder y i love to cry so much...& now i realize...
This is not vulnerable, i know how it feels...
I don wan to be the one who makes him cry...Im trying so hard...
Sis, i hope u too....please try yo best...don make them sad anymore...


It just seem like everything keep changing...
Relationship with so whoever....
From simple to the complicated one...
Omg...the gap between us really become bigger & bigger ady...Can't even find a suitable channel to talk to...

I so scare everything far from me...
I so scare when i scream "HELP" there is no one to lend me his/her helping hand...

Where is the happiness we used to have before???
I HATE MY LIFE NOW....